WhileGhostsseason 4 was full of iconic quotes, the best lines from each character were ones that revealed a quality unique to their personality.The ghosts of CBS’sGhostsare the real heroes of the sitcom, but the show’s human stars are no slouches either. Rose McIver’s Sam is the only human character who can speak directly to the ghosts, while her love interest, Utkarsh Ambudkar’s long-suffering Jay, is often tasked with pulling off whatever wild scheme the spirits have come up with in a given episode.
Thus, Sam and Jay are just as important as Thor, Sass, Isaac, Hetty, Alberta, Flower, Pete, and Trevor when it comes to the show’s success.Jay’sGhostsseason 5 storylinemay even prove to be one of the show’s most dramatic plots yet, as he attempts to get his soul back from Hetty’s scheming ex-husband, the nowdemonic Elias.Jay and Elias’sGhostsseason 5 storyhas a lot of potential, but it will be tough for the plot to outdo the best lines of season 4’s strongest outings.
11“This isn’t some Rinky Dink production. They performed at the mall.”
Sam is nothing if not self-serious, andGhostsseason 4 highlighted just how much this can be both a good and bad thing for its sitcom heroine. Taking the requests of the ghosts seriously allows Sam to keep the Woodstone Mansion’s many inhabitants from killing each other, but taking amateur local theater seriously left her unable to even audition for a role in a show without freezing up in fear.
In episode 5, “A Star Is Dead,” Sam’s audition for the Hudson Valley Players’ version ofAnything Goeswas assisted by advice from Alberta. As a seasoned stage star, Alberta was undaunted by the theater troupe. However, Sam sincerely worried that she wasn’t worthy of gracing the stage among these semi-professionals since, as she noted, they had played at the local mall. This line proves that, while Sam’s self-serious nature can be endearing, it also sometimes holds her back from experiences that could see her grow and change for the better.
10“May the sales of this book begin to remotely offset the amount of money we’ve lost on ghosts.”
Jay, “The Devil Went Down to Woodstone”
Even before he inadvertently sold his soul to the devil, so his restaurant would be a success,Jay’s role inGhostshas always been a little thankless. He does Sam’s bidding when she tells him what the ghosts need, but his inability to communicate directly with the ghosts makes this frustrating and often pointless. As such, it was not a shock when Jay suggested in the season 4 finale, episode 22, “The Devil Went Down to Woodstone,” that Sam’s book proceeds could go some way to offsetting the cost of facilitating the wants and needs of the ghosts.
Devon Chandler Long
Thor
Over the years, Jay has bent over backwards to accommodate the needs of characters he can’t even see or speak to.Sam and Jay can’t even have kids inGhostssince the ghosts occupy so much of their time and energy, so it makes sense that Jay would be glad to see this investment pay off after so long. One could even argue that Jay’s decision to hire Elias as a publicist was partially due to the financial pressure the ghosts put the pair under.
9“No, thank you. It…it goes right through me.”
Hetty, “St Hetty’s Day”
Hetty has a lot of great lines inGhostsseason 4 as she finally lets her hair down, drops her anti-Irish bigotry, and embraces her Celtic heritage. However, her best joke comes in episode 16, “St. Hetty’s Day,” whereinHetty learns that she can be seen by the living once a year. She uses this opportunity to flirt with Jay’s cousin Sunil, but can’t accept his offer of a coffee for obvious reasons. Hetty’s clever pun is a fun nod to the audience, but one that doesn’t give away her true nature to Sunil just yet.
8“That feels impossible—Which, not to push my thing, brings us back to my giving up plan, which could not be easier to execute.”
Isaac, “Thorapy 2: Abandonment Issues”
Isaac matured a lot inGhostsseason 4. Whether he was making peace with Patience, saving the rest of the ghosts from her, genuinely apologizing to his jilted lover Nigel, or allowing Sam to completely rewrite his biography, he truly grew up throughout the season. As such, it is easy to forget just how blunt and unhelpful he can be. However, in season 4, episode 11, “Thorapy 2: Abandonment Issues,” he gives viewers a great reminder when, as the rest of the ghosts suggest ways to save Pete from oblivion, he helpfully offers the option of just giving up.
7“Alberta is going to be very upset when she realizes Thor not at party. Please take mental picture of her agony and report back to Thor.”
Thor, “His Girl Shiki”
Thor has a fun character arc in season 4, growing to realize the importance of friendship after his many centuries in the Woodstone Mansion. After learning why his friends seemingly abandoned him centuries earlier in “Thorapy 2: Abandonment Issues,”Thor spends episode 17, “His Girl Shiki,” plotting elaborate revenge on Alberta for blowing off his 1000th birthday decades earlier. Of course, Thor’s plan backfires completely, which viewers might have guessed from his needlessly convoluted demand from a bemused Trevor.
6“A pair of fuzzy handcuffs? Yeah, I can see how that would be sentimental.”
AlthoughSass’sGhostsseason 4 story had a disappointing ending, the setup was superb. Since he died unexpectedly young, Sass had never had sex and the rest of the ghosts were determined to change this in the afterlife. Eventually, Sass got a fitting love interest in the sparky, funny screenwriter Joan, but his limited experience was subtly highlighted much earlier in episode 7, “Sad Farnsby.”
Sass mocking the kinky sex lives of the Farnsbys might seem like a typical throwaway line from the sardonic storyteller, but the gag masked some hidden depths. Sass’s discomfort with sex, and specifically his inability to imagine it as a prized sentimental memory, hinted at Thor’s revelation of his secret only a few episodes later.
5“Capitalism isn’t fair, Trevor. And now you know that.”
Flower, “Smooching and Smushing”
In episode 18, “Smooching and Smushing,” the plot involves Sass risking his life to tell Shiki he likes her, only for him to realize at the last moment that it is Joan he truly loves. WhileSass’sGhostsstorylinetakes precedence,Flower has an uncharacteristically shrewd B-story where she tricks Trevor into handing over $10,000 he earned at a remote job so she can give it to charity. When Trevor learns of her machinations, the ‘60s hippie cleverly throws his love of free-market capitalism back in his face with this killer line.
4“Anytime.”
Alberta, “The Bachelorette Party”
In épisode 15, “The Bachelorette Party,”Alberta almost ruins her descendant’s engagementwhen she mistakenly believes her fiancée is cheating on her and warns her of this in a dream. The problem is, when Alberta learns she’s wrong, she has no way of telling her descendant this. Luckily, Alberta gets around this by whistling “Ain’t Misbehavin’” to clarify that her fiancée is faithful after all.
The best line in “The Bachelorette Party” comes when Alberta’s descendant thanks her for settling her fears and Alberta tearfully replies, “Anytime.” Of course, she can’t speak to her family anytime as, just like all the ghosts, she is limited to the Woodstone Mansion. This reality makes the line a poignant moment for the pair.
3“Sure I’ll throw on some REO Speedwagon when I want to bang out 50 reps on the Thighmaster, but when it’s time to chill, I’m a jazz man.”
Pete, “I Know What You Did Thirty-Seven Summers Ago”
After Alberta’s moving moment with her descendant,Pete and Alberta’s romance shows a lighter side of both characters. This is particularly obvious in episode 20, “I Know What You Did Thirty-Seven Summers Ago,” where Alberta finds herself unexpectedly attracted to Pete despite their apparent incompatibility. When Alberta comes across Pete listening to jazz, he woos her with the most hilariously clunky one-liner he’s ever produced, andPete and Alberta’sGhostsromanceis officially on again for viewers keeping track at home.
2“’Tis from the bloodletting that killed me”
Patience, “Patience”
Mary Holland’s Patience got few opportunities to shine inGhostsseason 4since the humorless Puritan was mostly known for shutting down fun and scaring the Mansion’s customers. However, episode 1, “Patience,” showed her softer side when Isaac tried to flatter her.
Patience was thrilled when the ghost told her she had beautiful pale skin but, true to form, she managed to make this compliment creepy by admitting that her pallor came from the bloodletting that killed her. While it was an earlierGhostsseason finale cliffhangerending that introduced Patience, this line was what truly allowed viewers to get to know the uniquely strange character.
